After being with you for about 10 months and going through a tough nearly 6 weeks with you. I beginning to realise and understand the importance of a strong set of principles to a successful relationship with you or any other person. But most importantly, this set of principles are develop to suit your strong characters.
1. When in a relationship, be it a quick start-up without any prior understanding or after being friends for a long time, the most important element here is constant communication. We have to openly tell each other what we feel about each other. If we are not happy with certain things or acts, we should notify each other openly and just change from there. Without communication, we can never know if a person is happy or not.
2. Always trust your partner no matter what happen. You may have doubt in the beginning but always listen to what the other person has to say. And from there, evaluate yourself if it's worth accepting. If you trust your partner, you will never doubt their explanation and will accept it with open heart. A strong and lasting relationship begins with a strong base of trust and honesty.
3. Always be honest and open to your partner. Never have any secrets. But in any case, every individual has their own secrets. We have our own rights not to disclose something we feel not relevant and only mean a lot to ourselves. We can always keep that as a secret. A healthy relationship sometimes has secrets of its own. But it doesn't mean that the other party is not loyal. Always understand the reason why your partner choose to lie to you. And accept if it's reasonable. But in any case, if possible, always be honest.
4. Freedom. Every individual has their rights to be free and to have freedom to do the things they like. Going out with friends, hanging out with colleagues, drinking hours, movies hours with friends, a days outings, or even overnight at friends house after a party or group session together. It's totally fine. In the end of the day, what matters most is if your partners heart still belongs to you. If yes, then why think so much? Just let your partner enjoy their life no matter how often they do it. You will have a lifetime with her after getting married. There's no point in restricting their freedom. Let them fly and expect them to come back at the end of the day. This is love. Support what your partners life. Never cage your partner around your life. They are not birds, they deserve better and the only way they can be very happy is having a very supporting partner. I have learn this but no chance to proof it.
5. Find out what your partner likes and dislikes in life. Different people have different habits and different thinking. Some people might think that the things you say or do is sweet and that you are trying to spend more time. But your partner might think otherwise. Small stuff like, keep texting, keep fbing, keep whasapping, that is all tiny stuff that you don't have to bother at all. Just let her do it. As long as she is happy, then that is all that matters. If she doesn't like to blow her hair dry, why bother asking her. Or you can just go and blow it for her instead. If she likes to watch ghost movies, then just go with her. Why complain so much about it. There is no point in all this. I just felt like a complete idiot when thinking back about what I had just did in the past with her.
6. Never said words that you are not suppose to say, even if you don't mean it. I creates a lot of negative impacts and damages that are irreversible. Although sometimes, the words you say are just trying to get her reaction in certain things and you might said out of anger and desperation. She once said that all her words that she throw to me last time, all the harsh words are because of being pushed to a corner and she has to released it or she will explode. She actually has the same kind of attitude as I am in this sense. But I guess to make it better for the both of us, we have to compromise and in our case, I have to be the change in order to live a happier life with her (if we even have any chance of being together).
7. Support your partners hobbies, dreams, careers, interest, etc. This is extremely important. You have to be a supportive partner in the things they like to do. If they like dance, then just encourage them to dance. If they like swimming session, then just go swim with your partner. Just do whatever they like and in return, you will have a very strong base of relationship. This is again, my mistake. Coz I always said that she will be busy and have time for this. I should have encouraged her go straight away or bring her to register for dancing classes and swimming classes. I really feel that I am a jerk. I am so sorry to her now.
8. Never get angry at small tiny things. This is childish and immature. Avoid this at all cost and be a mature and open guy. You are suppose to be protecting your partner. Not being like a lady getting angry or jealous over small issues.
9. Never promise the things you can't keep. When you make a promise, make sure you keep it. If not, you're an asshole. I have made a promise that I will be her angel to guide and protect her for the rest of my life. No matter how hard it could be, I will always honor my promise that I have made and show to her that I will keep to my promise no matter what kind of situation I face. She might be with another man happily but that doesn't mean that I will have to break my promises. I also promise her to be a better man and wait for her return. I will make sure I did it no matter how long it takes. I will proof my love to her.
10. When you're in a relationship, appreciate the ones who has sacrifised so much for you. I know she has sacrifised a lot for me. I am truly sorry for disappointing her over and over again. I just hope I am not so much in love with her and don't worry so much. Because in that way, I would have stop disturbing her life the moment we left each other. I would have stay quiet and just walk away. Then she won't go through all this pressure. I just hope I don't love her so much and deeply. But reality cannot be changed. The truth just showed to me that I loved her more than any of my ex because of the stupid things I said and do. I have never done that kind of things to any of my ex before even for the 5 years ex. I just hope I can love her less so she is not suffering from all the pain. But I can't lie to myself. She is my true love and I truly loved her very much.
Finally. The 10 principles of a successful relationship. I will obey to it from this second onwards and never break any of it ever again. I hope time will be the witness for my change and for my growth. This will definitely shape me into a better man. Even though it might be too late to be with her. She might be happily with another guy, but I will still change myself for her. Love will only changes the person whom is worth the change. I will only change myself for the girl I love. And time will proof it. As much as I wanted her to come back to me and go to the Maldive trips with me and enjoy our valentine together, I will leave her to be happy with whoever she chooses. The final decision on her happiness is always in her hand. She decides her own happiness.
And finally, I will never bully her ever again. She is my beloved princess. How can I even bully her. love her and pamper would be my main priority even after we broke up. I will not force her and disturb her happy life but will stay with her quietly until she gets married. And even so, I will stay single because of my pledge and loyalty to her that my love will forever remain until the day I die.
I love you baby, always. Time will be the best witness for my change and you will see it. It may be too late but I sincerely wish you all the best and happiness with whoever you chooses.
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